Mental Illness and Christians

The term “Mental health” is a buzz word right now that’s getting thrown around and used in direct relation to school shootings and other horrific violent crimes. A blog post of one’s opinion can’t say what needs to be said regarding mental health but I have thoughts on mental health that I want to share. Just like my eyes are being opened to racism in new ways my eyes are also being opened to mental health issues in new ways. I desire to learn even more.

Hang with me as I share a story that I’ll never forget as long as I live.

One particular morning after praying I loaded up our toddler son and headed to the grocery store. As I pulled into a parking spot a friend flagged me down from in the parking lot and motioned for me to roll down the window. She had a desperate look in her eyes and said, “I need you to pray.” I told her to hop in and she said, “I can’t go into details but it’s Michael (her husband), I need you to pray for him. He deals with depression and it’s real bad this time.”

I grabbed her hand and we prayed for Michael together. She cried. And I was confused because Michael was a prominent figure in our community in terms of evangelism and outreach. He was a missionary with the NAMB and did resort ministry in Helen, GA. But nonetheless we prayed for his soul to be lifted and for God to bring a fresh hope inside of him.

My friend Natalie and her husband Michael attended a different church but lived in the same town as we did. After this incident I still didn’t know the extent of what was going on. Natalie shares in her book Tears to Joy that Michael was bipolar and for years together they hid his illness from others. When he was manic she would go to his personal office and do his work for him because he couldn’t function.

They hid Michael’s mental illness because somewhere along the line in reaching out for help initially they were told to pray harder and that it was a spiritual problem. So they kept hiding, praying and trying harder. Patterns of coming off medicine because he’d start feeling great and thought that God had healed him and then falling into a deep depression and becoming suicidal became normal cycles for them. Natalie didn’t always know when he stopped taking his medicine.

Finally in wisdom Natalie told Michael they had to tell one other person of his struggles. He resisted initially but she insisted. This proved to be a tremendous help and support. Michael had a phenomenal Doctor who they worked with but still Natalie eventually had to have Michael admitted to a mental health facility for additional help. She describes that as one of the hardest days of her life. In her book she writes about that day and I still have a mental image of her sitting in the parking lot alone weeping and crying out to God as she just helped admit her husband who was angry at her for doing so. But Natalie’s story is one of hope in the midst of such great pain. She shares that God was with both of them and He never left their side although those were some of the darkest days of their life.

Michael eventually got out of the hospital and was doing great. So great that he assumed once again he’d been healed and came off his medicine and fell into one of the deepest depression pits he’d ever experienced. And on a cold January day in 2006 he took his life in the mountains and entered his eternal home leaving Natalie and their 5 year old daughter. I’ll never forget Michael’s funeral. He was an amazing man who had an incredible impact on people even through all his struggles. It was one of the hardest yet sweetest celebrations of life I’ve attended.

A year after Michael’s death Natalie and I met at a donut shop and she told me, “I think God is calling me to write a book and get my Ph.D.” She was a single Mom with a first grader and I remember thinking to myself, “Wow, that’s quite ambitious.” But we prayed about this together and didn’t stop praying for years. She’d come to my house and we’d talk and pray and wonder what the future would look like. She enrolled in classes and started writing although it was extremely difficult to relive and recall those dark days. But she knew God was putting it inside of her to share with others.

It’s been 12 years and Natalie has written her book and earned a Ph.D. in Professional Counseling from Liberty University. She is Assistant Professor of Behavioral Sciences and Degree Coordinator for the Masters in Counseling at the Leonhard Schiemer School of Psychology and Biblical Counseling at Truett McConnell University. She facilitates a Survivors of Suicide (SOS) support group and is an advocate for eradicating the stigma associated with mental illness and reducing the prevalence of suicide. She has since remarried a godly man and their family is living out God’s call on their life.

I love how God has shaped Natalie’s heart to help the church understand mental illness and how it’s not always a spiritual problem. Sometimes depression is a result of spiritual darkness but not always. In her speaking she encourages people who are struggling with depression or any kind of mental illness or are living with someone who has a mental illness to just tell one person. She claims this is a huge step in moving forward because the more you hide the harder it is to seek help. And seeking help starts by telling one person.

Natalie’s story has helped me tremendously. Her book opened my eyes and although it’s a hard book to read I think it’s necessary we read books like hers to help us understand how mental illness impacts families.

Natalie is an excellent speaker and if your church or group is looking for someone I can promise you God will use Natalie’s story and teaching to help dispel common myths about mental illness as well as realize there is always hope with God. It’s a message our churches need to hear.

Later this week I’ll be posting about another book that was written specifically to help churches relate to and foster an environment to help those with mental illness that currently find church intimidating. I learned a lot in this book and could personally relate to some of the chapters as ADHD touches our family in a very real way.

Have you or someone you’re close to been impacted by mental illness? If so, what has been helpful in walking this journey? Leave a comment below and I’ll be drawing next week to give away a free copy of Natalie’s book Tears to Joy.