Today I was reminded of God’s sweet grace in my life. I had blown it big time in one of my relationships.
Oh alright, I’ll tell you.
I mentor a little girl at a school in our community. We’ve been “lunch buddies” since last year and I see her once a week. Well, about mid November when sickness hit our family over and over again I found myself every Thursday either at a Doctor’s appointment or at home with a sick child or sick myself. Then flu season hit. Eventually I fell out of the habit of meeting my girl who I had faithfully mentored up to this point. More time went by and I felt so guilty for not going. Not calling. Not letting the school know why I had not been there and so I didn’t want to show up. I was too ashamed. Three months had passed. I was committing the cardinal mentor taboo – not showing up without communicating anything. These are kids who need a positive influence in their life and to be one more person who doesn’t show up in their life pours salt on a wound.
The last two weeks my girl has been heavy on my heart. I knew God was nudging me to get back to seeing her but I didn’t want to face her. In my time with Him this morning He clearly showed me this was now an issue of obedience and there was grace for me in my lack of faithfulness. This was not about me and saving face. This was about a calling He put in my life.
I pulled into the school parking lot and couldn’t help but wonder if she would be mad at me. Or on the other hand would she even remember me. I spoke with her teacher who was as gracious as could be. And then my sweet little lunch buddy came over with a huge grin on her face and gave me a bear hug. And we picked right up. I told her I was sorry for not coming. Explained the sickness in our family and that I wished I had let her know through her teacher what was going on. She was quick to forgive as children so often are. I felt so much better. I was so thankful I had pushed through the awkward and uncomfortable scenario I had conjured up in my head of her throwing her lunch tray at me when I showed up three months late.
I’m so glad I got over that hump and fought satan’s lie that it was “too late” and that I had done too much damage to make it right again. Oh how thankful I am for God’s grace. His word is alive and active. God’s Spirit through His word spoke into my heart this morning about sincere love from Romans 12. Sincere love has a very distinct description. God used my time meditating on those words from Romans 12 to open up my heart to do something I didn’t want to do.
I’m so glad our God is faithful even when we are not. It makes me love him so much more and give me a desire to be more faithful to Him and others.
Linking with Jennifer, Holley and Kristin
Thanks so much for sharing a painful story and for reminding us of God’s faithfulness in the face of our faithlessness. He is a good God!
Yes, He is good Barbara – all the time!
I related to this post on several levels. I’ve being wondering about “too late” on a few dreams I’d like to pursue and the enemy has been trying to sell me on the lie that I ought to give up. Hate that he does that with the things we value and hold dear – the pursuit of things that will bring God glory. So glad you picked up where you left off with your girl and set “too late” to rest. Stopping by from Holley’s link-up.
Tiffany, so glad you stopped by. Praying for you as you decide where to move forward on your dreams. That the Holy Spirit will show you the season and the timing.
I love your sensitivity to the Holy Spirit. How wonderful that you stood strong against the lies of the evil one, and instead followed the prompting of your loving, heavenly Father. The outcome was beautiful. I, too, am often touched by the innocence of children, their willingness to forgive quickly, and their ability to ‘move forward’ into joy.
Blessings,
Kamea
incrementalhealing.wordpress.com
To be more like those children – that’s what I need. I guess it’s why Jesus tells us to have childlike faith.
Glad I found your post linked to Holley Gerth’s blog. I chuckled at the name of your blog page “Life is a bowl of wedgies”. I’m glad you went back to see your lunch girl. You could have been berating yourself and feeling guilty for years. It’s a good reminder for me. I sometimes imagine the worst and talk myself out of doing things. It can be a bad habit. Thankfully as I get older, I am learning not to always believe the “wedgies” in my imagination. 😉
“Wedgies in my imagination” – love it, that’s exactly what it was. So glad you stopped by.
What a precious post. I did the same thing in college. I was supposed to be tutoring an inner city kid and stopped showing up because I wanted to spend time with my boyfriend! I still feel bad about it 39 years later!
we do crazy things in college don’t we? I didn’t even have “college age/boyfriend” to blame it on just sheer lame-ness. Ha! I’m kidding. Sort of. Glad you stopped by Elizabeth. Come back and share again.
Yep, been there and sometimes, done that. Sadly, more times I’ve bought the lie… Thanks for sharing something that would be easier to hide and forget. It’s a timely encouragement.
Makes me feel better to know I’m not the only one in a sick kind of way. I was so close to hiding and forgetting and so glad that God kept at me and I wrestled through. Wish I didn’t have to do the fight thing but could just go more willingly but I’m still working on that stubbornness thing.
Melody, what a beautiful story! It’s never too late! I’m so glad you listened to His promptings. What a valuable lesson for us all!
God’s faithfulness and the forgiveness of children are two things that continually amaze me. I’m so glad you got to experience that grace and reconnected with your girl. Thanks for linking up at #ThreeWordWednesdsay.